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Wednesday, November 28, 2007

DAVID BECKHAM: SOCK-LESS AND PYJAMA-LESS DOWN UNDER

Being David Beckham's fake girlfriend is hard stuff. This week, in particular, our relationship with The Sex has been a real rollercoaster ride.

Today:

Confusion clouded our minds as we attempted to sort out how we feel about David's sockless ensemble at the Intimate Beckham Night promo event in Sydney.

Should we resent Becks for attempting to recycle fashion trends that should stay in the past? Or Is it possible he just did not have enough time to throw on some socks in the morning? How did his minders let this one slip by? Will the minder in charge of putting on socks get the boot? If so, can we be the new people in charge of sock-putting-on-ing? Does he need help putting on his pants too? How about his underwear?

These are all questions we need immediate answers to.

Monday:

Because we are nasty, we took the 'No pyjamas' statement he gave to This Morning to the next level. Oh, don't look at us like that.

Last weekend:

Sadness overcame us as we realized the full extent of what Becks not being in the running for 'Most Sexifiable' at Euro '08 might mean.

Although Becks and the boys managed to bring the LOLs for the greater part of England's qualifying screw-up, we have now realized that having The Sex erased from the Euro '08 picture is very depressing indeed.

It's okay though because we managed to get through it like we would any major break-up: a tub of Haagen Daz's Rocky Road coupled with our 2006 Champions League Final - Arsenal v Barcelona tape. Watching Freddie run over to give a disgraced Jens Lehmann a sympathetic 'you screwed up, but I still love you' pat on the arm, immediately sends us into the ugly Titanic-cry. Très thérapeutique.

TIET Lesson Du Jour:

Ladies, attempting to preserve your waistline and outward sanity by bottling up the anger - as we know many of you have done this week - is certainly not the way to go. Doing so will only cause you to release little bursts of the crazy, angry bitch within to the random, innocent and often, the undeserving. When faced with serious footballing disappointments it's best to simply give in and air out your emotions with some ice cream and a good cry.

source: Beckham exposed in the bedroom - No socks appeal: David Beckham's fashion faux pas - He Sleeps Naked splash
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